Panda Wok and Woll

I am addicted to Asian food.  I am ashamed to say that I passed this addiction on to my daughters (The Foodie and Princess) while they were in the womb. As hard as I try, I can only go about a week without something with soy sauce on it.  Invariably, almost every weekend--especially when one of the girls are home--a low and strong craving builds until I have to pay a visit to one of my favorites like Asia Bistro or Green Papaya for some General Tso's Chicken with Hot and Sour soup or the like. Sometimes I am so anxious, I don't use the chopsticks.

After going this past Sunday afternoon without Asian food, I thought I would be distracted by the Super Bowl festivities at the Snobatorium with the silly hype about which brother the Harbaugh  parents loved best. I almost made it too.  Then, just before the half-time show and during the E-Trade Baby Commercial (which we all thought was one of the best but did not make the masses' top five) the following picture flashed on the screen for half a second:

Boom!

Well that put me over the edge. I could not sleep that evening without dreaming of egg rolls with duck sauce and waking with my hands trying to work chopsticks.  The next day, while heading out to the bypass, I saw the newly opened Panda Wok next to Nails by Ly (which are owned by the same person) near where our favorite Moody's Hardware used to be (3044 McGehee Road). (Take a trip to one of the big box hardware stores and realize what you are missing).  It is also across from the same sad strip mall  where Indian Palace and Del' Amalia had struggled so valiantly to survive--but failed.  With fond memories of those former Gump restaurants swirling in my head like fried won tons, I decided to give the Panda Wok a try. 

I passed on the Pu Pu Tray (Egg roll, crab Rangoon, fried shrimp, beef cho cho and BBQ Ribs), and went straight for the hot and sour soup, egg roll and the spicy Hong Kong chicken ( $5.75 at lunch).  Was quickly satisfied with the service, cleanliness and taste of the food.  They could have made it a little spicier for my taste because I am a hottie err...I like it hot.  They can make it as hot as you want I am sure.

I was enjoying my fare when on the news came a story about a party at the Kappa Sigma house at Duke where they celebrated (or ridiculed) Asians and new-English speaker's difficulties with pronouncing the letter "L": One email featured the puppet character of former Korean leader Kim Jong-Il from "Team America: World Police" and reads "Herro Nice Duke Peopre" in a misspelling intended to convey an east Asian accent.

Deck the halls with boughs of horrey.....

Some of the students interviewed were outraged while others thought there were more important things to protest.  In any event, those clueless Kappa Sigs have apologized to anyone who did not understand they meant no lasting harm by hosting their "International Affairs" party. But it certainly appears insensitive to make fun of the way new-Americans butcher the accents just like they made fun of me in Venice last September when I tried to say "Per favore" or "Grazie" with a U.S. Southern accent.

Anyway, I was enjoying my lunch and the warm feeling in my stomach as the soy and duck sauce kicked in, thinking about the Panda in the hot tub with the E-Trade Baby and the party at Duke and trying to make sense of it all when the waitress came to me with my check and asked:

"wrill dat be arw?"

I have now learned that hot and sour soup can clean out your sinuses.  However, I do not recommend it.

WokaWoka.

Panda Wok
3044 McGehee Road
Montgomery, AL. 36111
Tel (334) 649-4649.

[Ed. Note: Tuffy is our newest Gumphead and this is her first attempt to amuse us.  Please give her only sensitive comments]

 

Lent in the Gump: Week 2 (Continued): Dinner at Central, Lunch at Green Papaya and the COA Men's Prayer Breakfast

Best breakfast for $2 in Gump is served here every Thursday.

As my mind clears from the effects of abstinence, I am more convinced that the practice of giving up "vices" for Lent is more ego-centric than it should be.  "Look at me," I say to the Cornbread Carp, "I have given up whiskey for Lent! (at least so far)."  Cornbread looks at me and replies with his trailer park wisdom: "Lent is not about you Allpots.  Have a beer."

"My word man, its 8:30 a.m.!" I say.

To which the Carp, cocks his head and raises his eyebrows and asks: "Scotch?"

Actually, I learned to think about this more clearly at the Church of the Ascension Men's Prayer Breakfast which occurs every Thursday at 7 a.m. in Ascension Hall.  It is relevant to these pages if for no reason other than it is where you can enjoy the finest breakfast in the Gump for $2.  Fresh biscuits, grits, sausage, cheesy eggs, all the coffee you can drink and some thoughtful conversation at no extra charge. Each visit confirms my belief that common men (i.e. untrained amateurs) are experts at only one meal: breakfast.  This one is cooked by attorneys, accountants and like-minded professionals and it is always delicious.  For $2 it cannot be beaten.

Yes, this is the River Jordan...which is nowhere near Lake Jordan.

Anyway, seeing pictures of the actual "wilderness" and the Jordan River brought home to me that 40 days in a desert is a true challenge and that the Jordan River looks a lot like Pintlala Creek except that after 40 days in a desert it would appear to be a most welcome sight. Giving up alcohol for Lent pales in comparison, although I do feel a tinge of joy as a walk near a bar.

Central decor compares with fine restaurants anywhere....

Speaking of which, on Thursday night I received a call from Precious (my new girlfriend), who invited me out to dinner at the new "Central Restaurant" in the Alley Station area of downtown.  I had previously received the following report from King Cotton about his visit to Central:


"Ladies and Gentlemen (and you too Allpots),

The missus and I went to Central last night.  It is the new restaurant downstairs at 129 Coosa (which is where we were married).  They have done a great job of decorating using old wooden beams from the building to make all the tables and such.

The atmosphere is dark but there is a good bar and a way to look into the kitchen from your table...seems to be the rage now.  We saw a lot of folks we know there...seems everyone is trying it out.  A Balch Bingham attorney was eating at the bar...he had been working late and had come over...his office is in the same block.

Entrees priced about comparable with other places in town.  Drinks were fine.  I had the hamburger which was okay.  Of course, the nice thing about a dark atmosphere is you can't see their mistakes.

We inquired about being able to seat our group and there are two options..one on the main level and one downstairs in the cellar which could be fun.  (Very clean and we saw no mice)

I would call for reservations 517-1155 and the preferred seating would be tables 52-56 which are round banquettes on the side where you can see everything going on.

I am amazed and encouraged by the rejuvenation downtown centered around the Alley.  The restaurant has an entrance from the Alley and now there is also a cut through from Coosa St. to the Alley.  As for how this restaurant compares to the other options in the Alley area...I would consider it the best place downtown...definitely better than Olive Room (and cheaper)

King Cotton"


Even on a Thursday night, this place was very crowded and it was fortunate we had reservations.  I tried to make an American funny (in homage to Yogi Berra) and said to Precious "Nobody comes here anymore, the place is too crowded."  But my remark soared over her head into oblivion. She looked puzzled and replied.  "Looks pretty popular to me."

Popular and cramped compared to other restaurants in Montgomery (except perhaps the bar at Chophouse VY) but I like cramped. It is the way restaurants are in Dublin, New York and New Orleans.  The decor here rivals restaurants in any of those cities.  What about the food?

Well, the food is a work in progress, as is the service.  But I must say there are clear signs that the food will soon exceed expectations at very reasonable prices.  The complimentary bread was warm and the butter/cream cheese spread was different and delicious. Precious had the beet salad and raved about it. I chose the "wedge" (which is actually about a 1 1/2 slice of lettuce laid on its side) which had a very nice bleu cheese dressing with fruit slices on top.  Much easier to eat served in this fashion rather than when you receive a wedge-shaped quarter of a head of lettuce.

Precious was concerned she had made a mistake ordering Amberjack because it is not her favorite fish to begin with.  However, she devoured the ample portion and gave the presentation and flavor high marks.  It is easy to overcook Amberjack and she reported it was perfectly prepared.

I ordered my favorite dish in general: The duck breast.  As for temperature I ordered "chef's choice" because I find the usual requests for medium or medium rare do not do duck justice.  I was not disappointed. The duck breast came sliced to reveal the tender red center which turned out to be the perfect temperature for that particular duck breast.  The potatoes were also prepared well.  So, as far as the food is concerned, we were very pleased and the tab (she had one Martini and I sampled the non-alcoholic and freshly prepared Ginger Beer), came to a rather reasonable $72 without dessert.  Thankfully, she picked up the tab although I reached with T-Rex arms in a show of possible payment.

The only real negative point was that conversations (and you know I am not a great favorite of having them with women) sounded like this:

"How was your Amberj...chowder is not right?"

She looked up and said: "It's delicious...send it back."

You see, the seats for two are so close together that your conversations combine with those around you to they form a cacophony of babble.  The couple next to us overheard Precious tell the waiter the decor reminded her of a restaurant in New York she had just visited and the male member of the couple began having a conversation with Precious about other neighborhood restaurants in Soho.  Of course, I tuned them out and pretended to focus on my duck so as to avoid having to speak with the woman next to me who could not possibly hear the conversation from her vantage point.

Next time I will take King Cotton's advice and request tables a little further apart.  However, there is no doubt I will go back to Central and may,  I said may, actually offer to pay.

Green Papaya offers a variety of Lao and Thai cuisine.

Friday for lunch the Gumphone rang for a gang visit to Green Papaya.  We have reviewed this popular Forest Hills restaurant before in 2010 and it was time for a quality control follow-up review.  The Younger and Squeak ordered staples like Pud Thai.  I however, saw the garlic pepper stir fry and went for it "Medium" spicy with beef.  What a meal. It cleared my sinuses and forced me to drink about a gallon of water during the meal but it was soooo good I ate every bit.  The group confirmed that we consider Green Papaya to be one of the best places for lunch in the Gump.

The only real problem was that Precious, whom I am almost sure has never actually smelled a goat, complained Friday evening while at her lake place that I, Chase Allpots esq., smelled like one.  After two showers and multiple flossings, the only thing that "cured" the problem was a large glass of milk.  I guess the moral is ...why I can think of not a single moral.  The point is that when they say something is spicy or has garlic at Green Papaya, they are not kidding.  Apparently Laotians don't play around.  Its the meal that keeps on giving, if you know what I mean.

Which gets me back to Lent in the Gump.  Week 2 almost in the book and so far so good.  I have stopped feeling sorry for myself and am looking forward to a Sunday respite from abstinence.

"Gee-ro" "Eu-ro" or "Jai-ro": Regardless of the Pronunciation, Gyro From Mr. G's a Welcome Break from B-B-Q

A typical "Yee-ro" waits to be bit.

I know most of you females out there are still pissed about the Casey Anthony verdict but I for one am glad it is over. After gorging the 4th and watching the cable coverage of the verdict on the 5th, today I was about as sick of watching that "reality show" trial as I was of B-B-Q pork, ribs, and chicken. So today I left the Gump in search of something that would not taste or remind me of "que" nor be too filling. The only other requirement was that it have no televisions replaying the same old tired gasps and gaffes and rehashed pundit soundbites relating to this year's "trial of the century."

Since I lunched at Green Papaya last week, the Lunch in the Gump contenders for today were: (1) a Sushi Cafe bento box, (2) some fainting goat from India Palace or (3) a gyro from Mr. G's. All are solid lunch spots previously reviewed by LITG. All serve un-American food which is not meant to sound unpatriotic. Finally, none to my knowledge have visible TV screens or at least the ones they have are tuned to some channel where they do not speak English. The winner was Mr. G's due to the need to do some business near AUM. I chose wisely. Perhaps better than the jury in Orlando. My Greek salad and Gyro at Mr. G's was just what the doctor ordered if not a little pricey at $11.57 with water. Our prior review of Mr. G's can be seen here.

But, I ask, how do you order it? I mean, how do you really pronounce the "G" in Gyro as it has been Americanized or Montgumphrized? Apparently, failing to pronounce Gyro properly in some cities is a mark of shame or cause for disdain.

To find the answer I went to where most Americans go today for misinformation: The Internet via Google (Follow the links to see the source).

I found there is a Facebook group named: "F*ck People Who Cannot Pronounce Gyro Properly." It is a group dedicated to the revolution against people who say jee-ro, G-roe and, especially, against french people who decide to pluralize and say jeeros. They conclude: "There are a million Greek restaurants, be a man!"

There are also those who get a kick out of trying to pronounce the word Gyro while showing pictures of weird looking birds. They provide all the possible mis-pronunciations and some pretty funny bird pictures.

Three girls from California, out one drunken night, decided to do an interview of a Greek Gyro vendor in Portland, Oregon as to the proper way to pronounce "Gyro." The very authentic result was "Heros."

Posters on Chowhound seek the answer because they: "Almost hate to order one since everyone in the gyro line is pronouncing it differently. Yarg." One "rockandroller" offered this reply: "Nobody pronounces it right and the people in the restaurants are used to it. The most egregious pronunciation sounds like "jai-roe" with the "jai" sounding like "pie." You're better off just trying "hee-roh" like "hero" but with a little longer "e". The correct pronunciation is actually a soft "g" which is very hard for most Americans to get right." However, I also learned that "heeroh" cannot be right because the letter "h" disappeared from the Greek alphabet 1500 years ago. They say "Yee-roh" is the correct standard Greek.

Believe it or not, the pronunciation of Gyro is the subject of a chapter in a literary journal named Linguist. You will be enlightened to know that some guy from the Department on Linguistics at the University of Illinois has gotten his masters in the study of how Gyro is pronounced differently in the South and East Coast from the North and West Coast. The explanation of the Greek pronunciation is as typically clear as most scholarly writing:

"In Greek, the word is spelled with an initial gamma, which is generally pronounced as a palatal glide before front vowels, so the posters in some gyros restaurants instructing customers to "Say yee-ros" are not bad guides to "authentic" pronunciation. Apparently there is some dialectal variation even among native Greek speakers, however, and some pronounce the gamma as a voiced or voiceless velar fricative, or even as a voiced alveo-palatal fricative."

Say it in "frickin" English next time why don't you? Can you imagine getting paid to travel to Boise, Idaho, to eat a Gyro and listen to how it is pronounced? Illinois tax dollars at work. I am sure they are proud.

I, for one, am more interested in how to properly eat a Gyro. One guy tried to show me on you tube, but how can you trust a guy who pronounces it like the people on the Facebook group hate? He was a sloppy eater too.

The ingredients of a Gyro include "Gyro Meat" from the elusive "Spirogyra" goat.

In any event, regardless of how it is pronounced, the Gyro at Mr. G's was very good. Served with an interesting variation of a Greek salad by a waitress from Millbrook who couldn't care less how I pronounced Gyro, it was the perfect lunch for me at this point in time. I also appreciated Gus P. stopping by to make sure I was satisfied.

Now, if we could only get over this Casey Anthony circus of the dis-functional family...

Αντίο!

Cecil Carp Hits Rock Bottom as Questions Continue....

(Finebaum Network)--As if highly acclaimed blogger Corn B. Carp did not have enough problems already, over the past week there have appeared highly trustworthy internet postings quoting annoymous sources and others who only contradict themselves every other day, that Corn B. Carp's father, the Rev. Cecil Newton Carp, was shopping great reviews from his son with at least one local sports bar in Montgomery: The Rock Bottom American Pub.

In what appears to be one of the finest examples of internet journalism, EFPN.COM (Eating Food Programming Network) reported that Cecil Carp had approached a friend of the owner of the Rock Bottom American Pub and said "It will take a lot more than a free lunch to get my son to write a favorable review of that dump." The source, who refused to be named, said the conversation was recorded and reported to the Federal Blogging Investigation Agency (FBI).

A representative of Rock Bottom American Pub first said they knew nothing about the contact with Rev. Carp, but later was reported to have turned the matter over to the Alabama Restaurant Association and the Montgomery Health Department. No review of Rock Bottom American Pub was ever posted on Lunch in the Gump where "Cornbread Carp" is a frequent poster. Lunch in the Gump is recognized universally as the world's most popular blog specializing in reviewing restaurants in downtown Montgomery, Alabama, affectionately known amoung locals as "The Gump." Urban Spoon, a national restaurant rating web, lists Lunch in the Gump as its number one blog.

When contacted for comment, the younger Carp referred questions to his attorney, Reginald T. McLucid, who issued this statement: "The idea that my client would even consider eating at such a dive, much less writing about it, is preposterous." McLucid is currently defending Mr. Carp against allegations he was involved in a "Food For Publicity" scheme related to a favorable review of The Green Papaya which was posted on Lunch in the Gump.

The Rock Bottom American Pub has consistently received unfavorable reviews on other restaurant review web sites, according to a representative of Urban Spoon, who also requested to remain nameless. "Perhaps Rev. Newton thought they would be desparate for a good review from the best blog around," the representative speculated.

From the looks of the dried crab claws and non-existent lunch crowd witnessed today at Rock Bottom American Pub, there appears to be a flock of patrons staying away from the establishment either because of the quality of the food or the recent scandal. It was noted that the menu did contain references to cornbread.

The editors of Lunch in the Gump, when contacted for comment, said that as far as they were concerned, their beloved "Cornbread Carp" was still eligible to post on the blog and would remain an author with authority to post. Attorney McLucid could not resist a parting shot: "The internet news media has hit Rock Bottom. The truth will eventually come out despite them."

Carp Indicted by FBI for Allegedly Demanding Improper Inducements for Favorable Post

(Association Press)-- A Montgomery blogger was arrested today at his trailer by agents of the Federal Blogging Institute (FBI) for allegedly demanding and accepting improper inducements from a restaurant owner to post a favorable review touting the owner's restaurant. Corn B. Carp, 33, was taken into custody at 4 a.m. this morning and charged with corrupt blogging, conspiracy to mislead the public and receiving improper inducements pertaining to a recent post on the "Lunch in the Gump" blog, which is purportedly the worlds most popular blog on eating lunch within the confines of the by-pass surrounding Montgomery, Alabama.

"This arrest reveals the dirty underbelly of the restaurant review blogging community," said chief investigator Prince Karming. "The Blog-Ola generated by organized and unlicensed restaurant review blogging corrupts many of those involved."
The 65-count indictment reveals that representatives of Green Papaya were wired by FBI agents when Mr. Carp, generally known by his nom de plume "Cornbread Carp," offered a favorable review in exchange for free egg rolls.

"I just want you to show me some love," the indictment quotes a tape of Mr. Carp during a phone call to the owner. "I really like egg rolls and a couple of egg rolls would help me understand the quality of the food and write a better review."

The indictment alleges that Mr .Carp received free egg rolls and, in exchange, wrote a glowing review of Green Papaya which appeared last week. In the review, still available at http://lunchinthegump.blogspot.com/2010/10/green-papaya-good-for-gump-and-you.html, "Cornbread Carp" made claims that the food would cause patrons to loose weight.

"Mr. Carp's mistake was asserting in the blog the egg rolls were 'complimentary' when we knew that they are always ala cart," said Karming who also noted that the post made several preposterous claims about the food.

When reached for comment Mr. Carp said only: "I was baited." He referred all questions to his attorney, Reginald McLucid. "This whole claim was politically motivated by Gov. Bob Riley because of a review of Eastbrook Cafe which revealed a raid on a local restaurant for serving pulley bones. We look forward to proving Mr. Carp's innocence at trial." McLucid noted that the Green Papaya had already been favorably reviewed on the Lunch in the Gump blog well before the alleged fraudulent transaction and that the egg rolls had no affect on Mr. Carp's review of the restaurant. "I mean, obviously, this guy really likes cornbread--not egg rolls," McLucid said.

Interestingly, the indictment listed several unnamed co-conspirators. For example, "Blogger No. 1" was described as suggesting the egg-rolls during a taped conversation at the restaurant. A "Blogger No. 2" was recorded speaking in a foreign accent--probably Asian--without articles in very short sentences like: "[Blogger No. 2] like." Further indictments are expected, said an unnamed source.

When contacted for comment, the Lunch in the Gump blog editors refused to take down the questioned post defiantly stating: "Except for all the obvious hyperbole concerning the benefits of Thai food, we stand by our post and behind the Carp!," the editor said. "Hell, we don't even allow advertising." The LITG web page does contain the following Advertising Disclaimer: "Although begged often to sell ads at ridiculously high rates, Lunch in the Gump has to date steadfastly refused to allow anyone to sway our opinions with the filthy lucre selling advertising space generates. The stupid "Adsense" stuff you see on the right-hand side is something Google adds but we (to date) have received none of the revenue from that nor do we control what the computer program selects for ads although the ads appear to be based upon what we post. Inquiries should be directed to bamabing@lunchinthegump.com."

Mr. Carp addresses the media with his counsel

Green Papaya Good for the Gump and You.

[Ed. Note: Despite the recent indictment of the "Cornbread Carp," except for the patent hyperbole concerning the benefits of Thai food, we stand behind this post and our friend.]

I know they do not serve cornbread, but GreenPapaya serves up the kind of food that makes a body feel good. Whomever at the Agonizer only voted the Green Papaya "three" forks has a lot of 'splainin to do. Why, that reviewer was dumber than Les Miles in the 4th quarter. Green Papaya is definitely "five" forks out of four by any unbiased observer.

Today the gang (Bama Bing, He Who Has no Nickname, The Younger, "Stormin Norman" and I) all decided to meet at the Forest Hills Shopping Center landmark where the prices are reasonable, service quick and food deliciously good for you. Boy were we not disappointed: Pud Thai, Mussman Curry Chicken, and some dish no one could pronounce. All served with a tasty soup, complimentary egg-rolls and a bottomless tea glass for under the Tojo Line. The chicken is hand raised, the curry home grown by Capuchin Monks, and the spices flown in daily from Laos. Some of the spices are known to lower cholesterol and increase the incidence of free radicals. They actually cause significant weight loss when ordered "Thai Hot." In other words, ordering food at Green Papaya causes you to leave healthier and thinner, if not slightly less wealthy.

Try as you might, I challenge you to find a better "Asian" food experience in the Gump. Voting on Urban Spoon has shown that a very high percentage of patrons of Green Papaya "like" it. In fact, Green Papaya is rated one of the top ten restaurants in the Gump and surrounding environs. So when voting time comes for the "Best of Montgomery" ratings in The Montgomery Advertiser, we at LITG expect you, our loyal readers, to vote early and often for Green Papaya. Together we can make it the number 1 "Chinese" restaurant in the Gump (as stupid as that sounds). It would be good for you and Montgomery.

Did I mention they serve beer?

New Poll: Gump Winter Olympics Medal Count

There is something going on in the Great White North relating to snow and ice.

Here in the Gump be sure to vote for for the presumed Country of origin for your favorite Gump "cuisine" in a new poll posted on LITG today! I am P.O.ed they did not list my favorite: Japan! Such is life in the Gump. Poll closes in 2/22/MMX.

Example 1: BBMAK likes goat curry at India Palace she should vote, duh, for INDIA!

Example 2: Fat Clemenza likes lasagna at Corsinos, he should vote for Sicily...er ITALY!

Example 3: Tojo like Green Papaya fried rice, vote THAILAND!

Example 4: Cornbread Carp likes Martins cornbread, he, she or it votes: USA!

Example 5: Burned-out "Statey" likes Tokyo MSG but since Tokyo serves nothing like Japanese food and, like the Shiba Inu in me, must choose some country other than Japan, vote CHINA!

Example 6: Show Dog likes the Chile Poblano with the head on at La Zona Rosa, he votes: MEXICO!

Get it?

Follow the only medal count that counts here on LITG. May the best Gump cuisine win!

SP

Originally posted at http://www.lunchinthegump.com/

Green Papaya: Tojo Yamamoto Ends Hunger Strike

Tojo upset because Ndamukong Suh not win Heisman Trophy. Lunch in Gump fans know Tojo love Thai food. Tojo figure anyone with name “Ndamukong” must be Thai so Tojo root hard. But slippery little Ingram win trophy. Tojo know in heart SEC refs cheat on vote count, so Tojo protest. Tojo go on hunger strike.

Tojo e-mail Lunch in Gump about hunger strike so Gumpers not save seat for Tojo. Tojo starve until Ndamukong get rightful trophy. Then Catfish tell Tojo Mr. Suh from Africa and Mrs. Suh from Jamaica. Tojo google. Catfish right. Hunger strike all for nothing. Tojo ashamed and hungry enough to eat frozen dog.

Tojo confide shame to Lunch in Gump. Loyal friend Shadow Pup suggest Green Papaya on Coliseum Boulevard. Tojo ask Shadow Pup, why Green Papaya? Tojo never hear of Green Papaya. Shadow Pup say Green Papaya have excellent food from Thailand and Laos. Make Tojo forget all about African-Jamaican Cornhusker and stupid hunger strike. Tojo say okay.

Tojo google Thailand. Surprised to find out Yul Brynner not king anymore. Find out hoochie-coochie trade 10% of tourism revenue. Tojo think, hmmm.

Tojo google Laos. Find out original name Kingdom of Lan Xang, or Land of a Million Elephants. Tojo bet slippery little Ingram happy about this!

Anyway, Tojo call Shadow Pup to ask direction. Shadow Pup say Green Papaya on Coliseum Boulevard by giant flea market. Tojo find Green Papaya easy but wonder who need giant flea? Tojo digress.

Tojo know to watch out for spicy Lao-Thai va-va-voom hot pepper from Sup in Gump review so Tojo order Spicy Basil Chicken (mild). Because of stupid hunger strike Tojo also order extra spring rolls, Chicken Satay and Papaya Salad. BEST LUNCH IN GUMP FOR MONTHS! TOJO LIKE!

Other Gumpers order Pho Special Combo, Tom Kha, Pad Prik Keing, Nau Pad Na Mun Hoy, Amazing Lad Na, Pad Woon Sen, Tham Mak Houng, plus Goong and Yun-Wun-Sen appetizers. What these mean? Tojo Japanese, have no idea. Tojo guess these all Laotian words for “taste wonderful” or “make nose run.”

Green Papaya menu remind Tojo of Deer Hunter when guard grab Christopher Walken by hair and shout, “Yum Pla Muck! Nam Tok! Pad Kee Maow! MAOW!” Tojo hate that part.

Tojo off topic again.

Green Papaya great lunch place. Everybody get out for $10 to $15. Tojo’s bill $42.65 before tip because Tojo starving from stupid hunger strike.

Who is this Tojo? Bring him to me.