Parts* if By Land, Nuggets by Sea: The Chicken Shack Keeps 'Em Guessing

Some of you may know that DNA testing of entrees in Mobile by a television station resulted in embarrassing some well-know seafood restaurants found to be serving "Grouper" that was not actually Grouper. You may have noticed since the DNA testing of fish became available to even teenagers, that something fishy has been going on with restaurant menus regarding references to specific species of fish. We Gump Guinea Pigs can confirm that references to specific species of fish are now gone from most menus (except our favorite Jubilee where they know the species because they purchase their fish whole and carve them into portions in-house). For example, the "Grouper Bites" at Sinclairs at Kowliga are now called "Kowliga Bites" described as "Fried White Fish." It seems that a Vietnamese fish called "Basa" is often mistaken or misrepresented as Tilapia or Grouper. Baumhower's restaurants tout "Caribbean Fish" on their menus. But, you probably knew all this.

What really makes this interesting is that on the way back from some Rest and Relaxation at the beach in South Walton County I passed what looked like a popular local joint in Luverne (on US 331) called "The Chicken Shack." When I entered and noticed the spartan decor, my Gump Guinea Pig training kicked in and I thought to myself, since everyone probably gets the chicken here perhaps I should go off the reservation and test them by ordering something other than fried chicken.

So, I perused the menu and guess what I saw?

Not Grouper Bites, not Basa Fingers, not Fish Nuggets. I saw listed under the $5 lunch specials for the day something I swear I have never, ever, seen on a menu before:

"Sea Nuggets."

I have the menu to prove it:




 Forget your first impulse that you can't order by the number when the selections are (A), (B) & (C).  Forget your second impulse to admire the logic of listing the "Sea" Nuggets as item "C."

Think of the concept of "Sea Nuggets." "SEA Nuggets."Sea nuhGETS."  Nuggets from the Sea....What kind of fish are they made from?  Then it hits you: The purveyors of this entree are not confident enough in the world of cheap DNA testing to even call these nuggets "fish."  All they are comfortable representing to their patrons is that these "nuggets" came from the sea as, I suppose, opposed to a lake, bay, lagoon, pond or drainage ditch. When you think about it, a lot of nugget shaped items can be found in the sea or washed up on the beach. The description "sea nuggets" leaves a large margin of error. After all, tar balls are nuggets from the sea. So are those pieces of crab you see washed up at high tide along with those squishy things that look like kelp pods.

What's next in a world of cheap DNA testing of entrees and restaurants afraid to identify even whether their meat is fish or fowl? Land Bites? Meat Nuggets? "Country Fried Fingers"? Just what would they consist of? Anything fried you could digest? There is a wide universe of potential components of digestible things that, for example, a guy like Tojo® would put in his mouth. I mean, are we digressing to menu items such as "Chewy Morsels" like they market dog treats that are not really meat at all?

Why not just "Mystery Meat"? Wait, darn. That implies it is really "meat."  Let's try: "Mystery Morsels." Yeah. That works. They could be anything that qualifies as a 'morsel.'

Anyway, the truth is that I passed on the "Sea Nuggets," because, after all, I was on vacation and out of my jurisdiction. The silver lining is that I learned what you probably already knew: The fried chicken (white meat) at a place called "The Chicken Shack" is going to be very good. I also enjoyed the three sides and 'nanner puddin'. They were all up to our generally high standards for a "meat and three" in the Gump. But the price, $5, was amazing considering the portions and a basket of pretty decent hush puppies. In other words, despite the distracting name of the one seafood (and I am only assuming it is seafood) entry on the menu, "The Chicken Shack" is, in my opinion as a fearless and expendable member of the Gump Guinea Pigs,a much better choice for lunch on the way to/from the Beach than the McDonald's "Chicken Nuggets" across the street.

And by the way, where do you find the nuggets on a chicken?

They must be next to the sea nuggets in the frozen foods section.

So, at the Chicken Shack, I recommend sticking with the land bird because that's an entree they are not afraid to designate by species.





(Urbanspoon does not recognize Luverne as a separate city from Troy)

®Tojo is a registered trademark of the American Federation of Fake Wrestling.

[*Ed. Note: This blog post was originally titled "Chick if by Land, Nuggets by Sea."  The name was changed to its current iteration upon the suggestion of a Doodah Man comment below.  Yes. We occasionally pay attention to our readers.]

Bama Bistro with Coratio Sauce!!

Bama Bistro to Go!

Back where I come from we sometimes eat fish for breakfast. I know my fish. Also, given my problems with gout, I have had to cut back on my extravagant lunch habits and my consumption of carbohydrates. These two ideas collided today with the idea of trying "Bama Bistro" again but, this time, ordering the grilled Tilapia. I hate to brag, but I believe I out-ordered the entire Gump today. That means you Whig in a Blanket! And, as a convenience, I ordered it to go so I could dine alone on my private lunch patio deep in the cool depths of the Gump.

This is what greeted me when I opened the Styrofoam:

Shown on my personal dining patio (doesn't everyone have one?). Fancy tablecloth not included.

When you order the grilled Tilapia from Bama Bistro and Chef Coratio is behind the grill, you are going to get a freshly grilled piece of fish AND a made from scratch buttery sauce with Tarragon (?) that rivals anything I have had in a while. For my sake, due to the low-carb diet, Chef C omitted the rice and substituted collards (with real ham hocks) and green beans, both of which were NOT from a can. Being a legal alien, I am not really sure what a ham hock is so I took a picture:

A "hock"

If you do not like "hocks" in your collards, go to an all you can eat buffet where the collards are poured out of gallon-size cans. To me, a hock in your collards or beans means "home cooked."

The price for this feast (with diet beverage) was just around $8 with tax. Well below the Tojo line. I would recommend calling ahead, however, because the entree really is cooked to order and it takes a few minutes to prepare. But today I enjoyed a nice chat with the patrons while waiting and learned a lot about why representing women in domestic relations cases is a pain in the.....(but that is a whole different story).

But while waiting I did learn some good news: Bama Bistro now has a liquor license and serves breakfast (for $3.99)! I love a nice tot of Jameson with my fried eggs don't you? To top it off, they are talking about opening on weekends too.

Bama Bistro's phone number is (334) 240-6938. It is located at 15 Commerce St. next to ServisFirst Bank (the old Colonial Bunker).

They are truly locally owned and deserve our seal of approval (which is a surprised-looking carp):

No offense Cornbread.

The Anti-Pub at Charles Anthony's

Those of you with years in the Gump under your belts surely remember "The Pub" when it was in Montgomery Mall. Established in 1972 the place was a local institution known among locals as a great seafood restaurant with its signature fried crab claws. When your competition was The Elite and The Sahara, having better seafood at a lower price was not very hard even with a small but homey place down in a hall in the mall. The Pub was cozy, the waitresses were grizzled veterans and the banter was that of regulars kidding the regulars. It was more like a bar with pretty good food.

The new place bears little resemblance to "The Pub" or a pub. Located out in West Shorter a/k/a Pike Road/East Montgomery, Charles Anthony's "at" the Pub is a very nice new structure located right on Chantilly Parkway off the Mitylene Exit. The fare is still primarily seafood based and the have their sauteed and fried claws which are good. On a busy Friday night they moved the customers through at a pace that locals appreciate. The wait staff was competent and friendly and the food was fair. The wait was less than 30 minutes even though the waiting area was pretty full. It was also nice seeing several friends who all remarked as they left about how satisfied they were with their meals. One said, "It was good as always."

We had the sauteed crab claws and 1/2 pound was plenty for three but a little pricey at $16.95 "market price." Question, where is the Crab Claw Stock Market where the market price is set?

Tayteese had the grilled Tilapia ($13.95) and enjoyed it. Gramma B, our guest, had the she-crab soup as an entree and declared it better than the same dish at Sinclairs. Yours truly tried the crabmeat augratin and found it to be unremarkable but certainly decent and worth its $14.95 price tag.

Clearly the place is popular for a reason: the food is reasonably priced and solid. Three of us ate for $72 with a glass of the bubbly each. The surroundings are nice and the waitstaff is proficient. Nevertheless, it reminds me more of a "Fifth Quarter" than a local pub. It is more "prozacky," as one Urban Spooner wrote, than local places in The Gump. I'm not saying you shouldn't go, I'm just saying don't expect anything like a "pub" atmosphere. The nearest dart board is at Academy Sports down the road.