Crossing the RED LINE Gangnam Style

[Ed Note 5/29/2015: Looks like Gangnam has bitten the dust]

The leaders of Lunch in the Gump have previously declared the Eastern Bypass to be the red line boundary of the Gump over which no self-respecting member of LITG should cross without changing the calculus of supporting our local mid-town restauranteurs.  Yet, in the past our leaders have ignored the red line in the asphalt as other members have brazenly visited terrific places like Wishbone Cafe or D'Road and lived to blog about it.  This has obviously weakened our foreign policy.  However, never before had we, the elite Gump Guinea Pig Squeal Team Six*, ever been asked to venture into West Shorter until we received our orders to try the new Gangnam Grill which recently opened just across the bypass from the Gump.

Steeling our nerves and with our muzzles all a'twitch, we passed through the busy intersection cameras without triggering the flash that leaves a record.  There in the former Hooter's building--Hooter's being the bane of fine dining, women's liberation and a non-Gump chain (good riddance)--was the new and well-signed Gangnam Korean Grill & Bar.  The interior decor was very stylish and totally changed from what I imagined to be the tacky raw wood of the interior of a Hooters.  Chic all the way.  My only problem was the markings on the bathrooms caused me to mistake the ladies room for the men's room.  Thankfully, there was no one home and no one noticed but me.  An international incident was avoided.

What is "Gangnam" you ask?  Well, according to a lot of unsubstantiated internet chatter, it is a section of Seoul, Korea south of the Han river ("Gang"+ "nam") where there are lots of glitzy clothing stores and restaurants serving Korean "bulgogi".  The area was made famous by the Korean pop star Psy(cho) and the video: "Gangnam Style," the title of which we incorporated into our little report of this date.

The real question should be: What is Korean barbeque? That's a good question. Most people don't know what Korean BBQ is -- even we the GGP's who just had it and, I suspect, even Koreans themselves!

The phrase "Korean BBQ" was made up by Koreans who live here in the States.   It was a way for Korean restaurant owners to advertise what they were selling. Americans are less likely to understand what "bulgogi" or "bulgalbi" is. Not only is it hard to pronounce, it doesn't even sound good to eat. The phrase "Korean BBQ" fixed all that.  People understood what is was, albeit wrongly, and it sounds pretty good too.

Currently, what most Korean restaurants mean by "Korean BBQ"--and what the Gangnam Grill apparently subscribes to -- is any meat -- beef, pork, chicken, or seafood (squid & shrimp) -- that is marinated in a Korean sauce and cooked over an open fire.  The Gangnam Grill even includes vegetables under Korean BBQ.

I ordered the pork (I cannot pronounce or spell the Korean name) for lunch and was soon brought what seemed like 12 little bowls of various spices, vegetables, chest nuts etc.  Here, a picture is worth a thousand words:

Actually, it was 12 bowls.  Any idea what they are?
(Notice I was not wearing my eye protection)

Although the waiter was very nice and attentive, he did not look Korean and I was pumped up with too much testosterone to ask any questions about what was in the bowls or what I was supposed to do with them.  Fortunately, as I sat there pondering the 12 little bowls, the place began to fill with persons driving Hyundai's and appearing Korean.  A pretty good sign I would say.  My international Squeal Team Six training allowed me to overhear snippets of their conversations in Korean.  I snickered when I caught and translated a comment about me: "Oppa? What's with the little furry dude butchering the chop sticks?"  Of course, I never let on I spoke pigeon Korean and it is true I have a hard time with the sticks.

Anyway, I watched what others were doing trying to determine what I should do but they were mostly women and they were not ordering what I ordered.  I fell back on my training.  Logically, they would not bring out these little dishes before the meat dish for no reason.  So I began trying to eat them although I honestly had no idea what some of them were.  Actually I could only recognize the trusty onions.  Nevertheless, I tried them all and was pleasantly surprised at the variety of flavors--mostly all interesting and pleasant.

The stars of the show: pork, soup and rice on a sizzling platter

In due time the waiter appeared with a sizzling platter of shredded marinated pork and vegetables, with a cup of a tangy soup and little silver bowl of white rice.  Since I had not eaten all that was in the little appetizer bowls, I started mixing in the contents of the bowls with the hot meat and added rice.  The mixture of flavors was refreshing and new to my relatively unsophisticated pallet and very delicious.  For the money, I enjoyed a very fine lunch as I sat in a swanky restaurant looking back across the DMZ into the Gump.

I have double-checked with the trusty Lunch in the Gump crowd on Facebook and several of them have been raving about the place.  Entries on Urban Spoon and Yelp were also positive.  So, after the normal incubation period with no adverse gastronomic effects noted, I can release this report to you as a recommendation to try Korean "BBQ" Gangnam Style.  No animals were harmed during this investigation except for perhaps one pig.

*For more information on the fearless and expendable Squeal Team Six, click here and read the ASPCA Notice below.

No Bread in the House

We proud Gump Guinea Pigs have seen a lot of strange things in the service of Lunch in the Gump fans.  We've taken gastronomic risks no patrons of lunch fare should have to endure.  We've been starved, sat upon and thrown out on our ears. But the last thing we expected to face when a squad was sent in to sample the chicken salad sandwiches offered by "The House of Bread" in Old Alabama Town was they were out of wheat bread by 12:15.  Yes, you read that right: No bread at House of Bread.

House of No Bread
(Photo from Montgomery Advertiser)

Normally we discount anecdotal accounts of the foibles of new restaurants because we all know a very good restaurant can have a bad day or a bad meal or two.  But "House of Bread" has been open about four months now and not only did they have no wheat bread, they ran out of the chicken salad after serving one of the GGP's this tiny portion--a mere melon ball scoop--of chicken salad with three packs of saltines.  At least, because they originally thought they were going to be able to serve us a sandwich, there was a bag of chips included which, as you can see below, was devoured before the entree arrived.

A daub of chicken salad with a few leaves of lettuce and three small tomatoes.
(Photo from secret GGP iPhone)

The chicken salad was more finely ground up than we usually see in restaurants this day and age but what was of it available was tasty for the three bites it supplied. The "unsweet" tea was also good although it came pre-sweetened.  It was a good thing one of the squad tasted it first or he would have enjoyed super-sweet tea.

All in all it was not an auspicious performance. But, that is what the GGP's are here for: checking places out and twitching their noses.  On the bright side, the building is quaint, the waitstaff is willing and the menu offers traditional light lunch fare. I understand the catering side of the business is what propelled them to open for lunch.  We emphasize this is only one visit and one item ordered.  We believe it is worth a visit to see if others catch them on a better day.  For a more favorable reviews click here or there. The location is, at the very least, an interesting place to visit.

Squeak Peek: Eat At Joe's...Again

UPDATE as of June 7, 2012: Returned Again to Joe's Again. Was at first apprehensive that the place had changed hands. They have painted the structure red and yellow and today there were no signs of any kind indicating the name of the establishment.  However, once inside I quickly saw nothing really had changed. Same menu. Same Joe and same awesome "Joe's Burger."  I need a nap.....


July 21, 2011: Returned to Joe's...Again on Friday last week for the "Joe's Burger" and again today for the regular cheese burger. I was blown away, I mean, in a good way. Not injured but almost stuffed beyond capacity with what may, just might, perhaps, maybe, possibly be the best, I said BEST, double cheese burger in El Todo Del Gumpo! Maybe. Since I was alone I cannot confirm the rating. We will need other GGP's or LITG members to weigh in on the important matter of determining whether Joe's Again is a tremendous find and we crown them as having one of the best burgers in the city. And we haven't even tried the ribs and wings for which they are locally famous. Stay tuned.

It's hard to imagine the size of it without some frame of reference. The cup in the background is a LARGE drink cup.

For now feast your eyes above on the "Joe's Burger." Two hand-formed and what seemed like 1/2 pound patties with cheese cooked to perfection with grilled onions, pickles and peppers and crisp tomatoes and lettuce. Very difficult to eat with tiny paws. Did I mention it was messy? It was messy for sure. But was it ever good! I could not stop eating even when my tummy felt like it would pop. The burgery goodness forced me to keep gnawing my way through this burger monster. I left sated and stayed that way for about 2 days. Was it just me or was it one of the finest burgers I have had...EVER? You decide.

Check out Joe's...Again and let me know what you think. Send comments (if you do not want to post them) to squeakGGP@gmail.com

Now, here was the original post on Joes concerning their also fine cheese steaks:
_______________________________________________

First, I want to thanks to the girls at MCOA for suggesting a Gump Guinea Pig foray down West Fairview to Joe's Again Buffalo Wings & Rib City. They provided some good intel on where to find a good Philly Cheese Steak sandwich in the Gump. Second, as someone who has visited Philadelphia several times for weddings and business, no one in Philly thinks any thing made outside of Philly should be called a cheese steak or can hold a candle to Pat's, Geno's or Jim's--although they really cannot explain why they prefer Pat's over Geno's or Jim's or visey versey because they all have a favorite. It's like Auburn v. Alabama v. Troy here in the Gump. There you have to pick Pat's or Geno's or Jim's (which is sort of like Troy).

For those of you unfamiliar with the fifth food group a/k/a the cheese steak, here is a quick primer: Its thinly sliced steak, onions ("Wit"), cheese (or cheese Wiz) and bell or Italian peppers on a split Kaiser roll. The main reason you cannot get good ones outside South Philly is because it's hard to find the right bread. They do not travel well and they will not ship them to you. You can try to make one at home. If you are inclined to try, here is a very good recipe from someone who has a cheese steak fetish (which I suppose is more healthy that toe or toad sucking).

Back to Joe's...The great thing about this place is the guy behind the counter in the pork-pie hat with the booming baritone voice. If you are an adult, he greets you when you come through the door with a Nat King Cole croon. However, if you are one of the local kids from Carver, he starts asking questions about what sports they play, what they want to do after high school etc. He also imparts wisdom like: "You got to do something after high school" or "You've got to make something of yourself." I guess because of the maximum street cred this place has in this area,
"Joe" (I assume it's Joe) gets away with poking his nose in their business in a way any other proprietor might not.

Bottom line: This place is a very short drive south on I-65 from the Gump (take the Fairview Ave exit and head East) and if the cheese steak is any indication of how good the other items on the menu might be, I will have to go back again and again. Due to limited seating I do recommend take-out and a call ahead would probably be a good idea.

Stay tuned for further reviews of what we hear is a very good double-cheeseburger: The Joe's Burger....until then, this is Squeak, over and out!

Squeak Peek: Capitol Oyster Bar Sea Dogs Relocate As River Rats

We at LITG had been saddened to hear of the closing of our enigmatic Capitol Oyster Bar given our high rating while at its former location in a prior post. We were also disappointed that the Marina Bar & Grill had closed even though we still miss poor Nibbles, our fallen GGP comrade, starved by the slow service experienced when the Marina Bar and Grill opened in March of this year.

There was, therefore, much excited squeaking around the GGP barracks when we received hard intelligence that the COB had recently reopened at "The Marina" on Shady Street (a more aptly named street there has never been). Of course, the GGPs were tasked with visiting the recently opened COB and clearing it for LITG regulars. And we did.

It was, alas, a mixed result. The experienced staff and cooks at the COB can and will make the best of any surroundings. After all, they made a grungy Pizza Hut building on the Southern By-Pass seem like it was Tacky Jacks on Perdido Bay. And today they were still working out the kinks with a location with severe kitchen size limitations. Ticket to table today timed out at over 30 minutes (that's 1 1/2 months in Guinea Pig years). We almost would have lost Sgt. Puffer but for the abundant saltines in the basket at the table. We were also a little taken back by the prices. The cheapest meal for lunch is going to be $9.95 without the $1.50 tea. You could, if you were crazy or Cajun, order the frog legs as an appetizer and save a buck. We GGPs find them too similar in size and appearance to the Ecuadorian delicacy Cuy.



The food (fried oysters and shrimp) when it arrived did somewhat save the review from negativity. The COB slaw has always been very good. It rivals the slaw at Jubilee. Their fries are also decent. However, you can hold the "Texas toast" (between your knees) as far as I am concerned. Next time I will get the much better Hush Piggies. The oysters were reported by Sgt. Puffer to be tasty but I found the fried shrimp to be average. They we also not as hot as you would expect when you receive your lunch 30 minutes after it was ordered. That is especially true when you know the experienced staff working in a small kitchen would never miss an opportunity to get food out the door. The portions are certainly fair as the picture below attests:


Upon departure the review was completely redeemed by all of the cool "Blue's" posters tacked in the entrance area documenting the many known and obscure Blue's bands which appeared at the old location over the years and with the owner's promise that the COB will have more of the same at the new location at the Marina. The owner also promised that their liquor license was one/two weeks away and they would have Pabst Blue Ribbon just like they did before. We all know that fried seafood tastes better with a beer--especially a PBR--even at lunch. So our company left the COB encouraged that they would work out the kinks with practice and alcohol. The promise of a better day and the truth of the application of alcohol to the COB clientele was proudly displayed on this poster over the shelves where the liquor will soon be:


When they have the PBR, we will return!

[UPDATE! September 2, 2011: Capitol Oyster Bar now has liquor license. Great deck to watch sunset with your favorite beverage. They have PBR Cornbread Carp!]

GGP "Nibbles" Starved at "The Marina Bar & Grill"

Ed. Note: The Marina Bar & Grill has, as of July 2011, closed and the Capitol Oyster Bar has moved into the space. Check out the post for July 12, 2011 for the details. Nibbles and the Marina will be missed but the COB will be a great replacement....we hope.

Nibbles no more. (At least someone was happy about it).

It is my sad duty to report the loss in action of one of our fearless and expendable members of the elite Gump Guinea Pig Early Strike Force at The Marina Bar & Grill Friday. The LITG Gang had visited The Marina shortly after it re-0pened and gave mixed reviews, especially concerning the slow service. With the appearance of wonderful Spring weather and the heightened allure of The Marina, the GGPs were ordered in this week to perform a standard recon to ensure it would be safe for our faithful LITG followers.

Unfortunately, things went awry....slowly but seriously.

After one hour of nothing but water and ketchup, the heat and sun took its toll on Gamma Company. Nibbles (Code Name "Gnaw"), the jokester of the company, succumbed to exhaustion and hunger. He was originally thought to be faking severe hunger. However, when the rest of the company realized he was truly famished and there was no food in sight, it was too late. Nibbles, already too weak to make it out under his own power, had to be carried out by the rest of Gamma Company. The meager rations of red beans and rice were not sufficient to revive him. By the time they reached available food, Nibbles nose had quit twitching.

He will be missed. Especially, by his 3 dozen children. "Fortunately," his commander Squeak said, sunflower seed in cheek, "there are plenty more where he came from."

The debriefing suggests that LITG fans avoid The Marina on Friday's during good weather between the hours of 11:30 a.m. and 1:15 p.m. The 31 tables cannot be covered by the two waitresses in time to provide nourishment to those used to eating in less than 1:15 minutes. Alas, this warning was too late for Nibbles but, after all, we sent him in because he was expendable.

Goodbye brave Nibbles. Next time take a snack if you are going to The Marina on a Friday.

The Soup at Sa-Za's Pizza

Wedding soup shown with garlic bread.

As an elite and expendable member of the recently formed Gump Guinea Pigs, I have had my eye for some time on the lunch time activities of one local individual whom I shall identify only as "Finicky Real Estate Lawyer." I have noticed that over time this Finicky Real Estate Lawyer walks to lunch most days in what has developed into a habit involving where he will eat lunch. Since he is a fastidious dresser and well-respected bon vivant, I thought today would be a good day to tail him to see what he has found within walking distance of The Alley downtown.

I am aware of the fact that members of this blog have had spats with the staff at Sa-Za's about triple parking in loading zones--especially on Sunday. They know who they are. But I cannot deny that Finicky Real Estate Attorney quickly ducked into the Alley Station--cut a glance into the new Deli in the Alley (undergoing a pre-opening run-through)--and then dashed briskly into Sa-Za's Pizza, rushed past the "greeter" and bee-lined for the Captain's table which separates the kitchen from the dining area.

Due to my size, I was not noticed scampering along behind. But from my observation point, I noticed that almost no words were spoken to the staff. They recognized the Finicky Lawyer. Immediately winks and nods were passed like some form of code and the meal was on.

What had this anal retentive attorney and counselor ordered at a restaurant known for pizza, pasta and other home-cooked "serious" Italian fare?

The suspense was causing me to gnaw at a table leg.

Then, within about five minutes, the chef handling the table placed a black bowl with a big spoon before him along with a piece of garlic bread which, naturally, he had ordered with the garlic removed.

Climbing inconspicuously up one of the natural wooded beams which give the place a modern warehouse ambiance, I was able to snap the photo you see above. Then I climbed down from my perch, twitched my nose and began to scour the menu for a clue on what it was that had been served.

Nothing matched. In fact, there were no soups at all listed on the lunch menu. Yet, clearly, this was a soup he was ladling into his prim and proper face. A closer look and I saw spinach, Parmesan cheese strands and sliced meatballs floating in a creamy white broth.

Why, I thought, that is Italian Wedding Soup! By Cooper, Sa-Za's is serving a soup that is not on the menu! Apparently, you have to wink, nod or ask for it by name.

After he finished I was astonished by what I saw next. Our Finicky Lawyer finished the entire bowl with no complaints, placed seven dollars ($7) on the counter and left. My investigation revealed that the cost of the soup with bread is $5.50. Wow, I thought, that is pretty reasonable. And he was in an out in about 20 minutes. Speedy service.

Before the staff could clear away the bowl I had a little taste from the remnants. Wow again. This is really good. Very very good.

As I write this back at GGP HQ, I still have a warm glow in my belly and a desire to have more of that fine soup. My report is now in and the quarantine period has passed. I can officially declare the Italian Wedding Soup safe for LITG members and their fans.

Enjoy.

Your friend.

Squeak.

Gump Guinea Pig Raid Goes South at Bombay Masala



Things went "South" quickly...and loosely.



We Were Guinea Pigs Once....and Young.

(AP--Montgomery) Wikileaks, the international non-profit organization that publishes submissions of private, secret, and classified media from anonymous news sources and news leaks and its pedophile founder Julian Assange, is at it again. Recently, WikiLeaks released excerpts of a Top Secret Report to the LITG Secret Committee (and they know who they are) concerning what appears to be a disastrous raid conducted by the "Elite and Expendable" Gump Guinea Pigs just outside the Gump at Bombay Masala in early January 2011. According to the report, two of the members of C-Company (Cooper Company) of the GGP suffered  gastronomical distress following a visit at Bombay Massala in early January barely making it back to the extraction point and then to GGP headquarters. Fortunately, the two commandos appear to have survived and have been declawed and debriefed.

The existence of the GGP commandos was only recently made public on the LITG blog. It is not clear when LITG intended to release official information concerning the raid. However, the secret report did suggest giving the Bombay Masala luncheon buffet a wide berth and ordering from the menu if avoidance was not available as an option. Indeed, the "Chicken" Vandaloo was suspected for what appeared to be an urgent need for emergency lavatory time by the entire C-Company team. Lavatory visits are referred to as "Posting Up" in the report. What that means is unclear. Perhaps it is some form of secret code.

A classified photo of the GGP commandos was also included in the Wikileaks post. It is believed to show the C-Company and their leader known only as "Squeak."  The other members of C-Company were not identified.

Top Secret photo of C-Company in happier times...

  

Apparently, as if things could not go worse, the GGP commandos experienced transportation/extraction problems that contributed to casualties.

A representative of LITG, Tojo Yamamoto, decried the publication of the secret report by Assange's Wikileaks adding: "Tojo make pretzel of girly man Assange... but he might like.  Tojo just fume."

Assange was unavailable for comment.