March Madness in the Gump: The Effete Eight

It's still March--and it's "Madness!" The LITG gang secretly seeded all the top 64 local restaurants in the Gump and initiated the first ever LITG Gump Championship Tournament (LGCT) for 2010.  Watching the seedings was akin to watching a slaughterhouse make sausage or our legislature make laws.  We will spare you the horror or the details. Bottom line: Here are the EFFETE EIGHT:

In the "Central American Regional" the Fighting Chile Poblano's of La Zona Rosa overcame the El Taqueria Cantero's Jolly Jugs and their knife and fork offense.

In the "Soul Food Regional" in Memphis the Cookmas Ham Hocks eeked by the Davis' Cafe Wings by 196 diastolic over 130 systolic to place the upstart Cook Ma's into the final four for the first time in forever. The Cook Ma's dressing scored 110 bad cholesterols in the last half of play.

In the "Cardiac Regional" it was the 'Widowmaker' of the Hamburger King Kings dunking over the "double" of the Chris' Hot Dogs Bulldogs to slide into the Effete Eight by a score of 16 to 12 oz (with a recorded heart attack in the paint). Brrrrrrrp!

The "French Regional" in San Francisco was a real stem-winder with the Lunde's NOLAs stomping the tofu out of the Cool Beans Lady Sprouts by serving up the goods at half the price with half the attitude.

In the "Lard Regional" you had the Martin's Crimson Pullybones dunking their cornbread over the top of the Cattlemen of Stockyard Cafe with real butter on the side.  It was perhaps the closest contest leading to the Effete Eight.

In the Far Eastern Regional the Green Papaya Stir Fries got Thai Hot in the second half to kick the pud out of the Lek's Railroaders.

In the "Fine Dinning" Regional the Chop House Legislators used their sharp steak knife offense to split the wedge defense of La Jolla Hoyas and defeat them in double overtime with, of course, lobbyists cutting down the nets and picking up their checks.

Finally, in the Mediterranean Regional it was a dominating performance by Joe D's scrappy Sa-Za's Ta-Tas putting the pasta and garlic offense to the hometown favorite Corsino's Sicilians and their anti-pasta defense.  Unfortunately, some of the key Sa-Za's players went missing after the game.

Stay tuned for the results of the FINAL FOUR.