Gump on the Go: Scott Street Grocery & Deli

Despite the prevalent pall over the country due to the passing of the "Lyon of the Senate," those who still pay taxes must nevertheless take some time to find sustenance away from trying to make enough to provide health care to those who do not work. For the Gumper on parole (or the poor sap still chained to his desk) one of our best-kept downtown Gumper secrets is the little hole in the wall Scott Street Grocery & Deli. Although there are "NO PUBLIC RESTROOMS" and it appears to project the pretext of being a "grocery," if you avoid eye contact, move slowly toward the right as you come in and know the pass code ("The Italian Please") you will stumble upon a small deli counter from behind which two cute, smiling and fast sandwichista's will immediately begin peppering you with questions you won't hear at Subway like: "Homemade wheat or white?" "Vegetarian or Carnivore?" and "End or middle piece?" But there is one question you will never hear on Scott Street and that is: "For here or to go?" That is because--dear devoted LITG follower--everything at Scott Street is "TO-GO" as there is no place to sit except out in your vehicle while you listen to your favorite radio program profusely shower praise upon the man who gave us HMOs the last time we "fixed" the health care crisis and the Immigration Act of 1968 the last time we "fixed" that problem. But I digress, my right to vote has not yet been restored and my opinion does not count.
The bottom line was that my "Italian" sandwich weighed in at a whopping 24 ounces (I actually weighed it) chock full of meat, cheese and a lot of green stuff with oil on it. Very tasty and, at $6.49 (.27 per oz) quite a bargain. To top it off, they actually have Cokes in the old style little curvy bottles. This place is a real throwback to the days of the little country store. I could almost imagine a couple of old geezers sitting in the corner playing checkers over a cracker barrel farting and bitching about how the Kennedy-Kevorkian Health Care Plan was going to affect their Social Security checks.

If you are in a hurry call 264-9415 and order up one of their fine sandwiches to be picked-up by one of your flunkies. I'd tell you where to go but because I do not want to have to wait a long time for my next "Italian" I have intentionally avoided disclosing the exact street where this wonderful deli is located and would appreciate it if you would keep this info "down home cuz."

I ate the whole thing and went into Rigor Puppus...