Sunday Night at The Palace

[Ed. Note: After a hiatus in Pensacola, the IP is BACK in the GUMP!  Yee Haw!!  New location though]


("Yes" I am out on bail and "No" I cannot talk about it).

Dinner at "India Palace" Sunday night reminded me of a joke (perhaps grounded in truth) I heard years ago: A college professors' Peugeot breaks down on I-65 near Clanton and a Good Ole Boy mechanic comes and stares under the hoof for several minutes when the professor finally asks: "Well, do you think you can fix it?" To which the Good Ole Boy just sighs and says: "Fix it? Hell, I can't even announce (pronounce) it."

Located in what used to be a thriving group of shops across from Moody's Hardware and Ligers (actually where Del'Amalia used to be), India Palace has slowly and surely made a name for itself as one of the best restaurants in Montgomery. I would say best "Indian" restaurants but there is only one other and it is not good. I really mean it is one of the best restaurants of any kind. Of course the decor is sparse, the furniture basic, the lighting garish and the music annoying. (The place mats are really "Find the 36 mistakes" visual puzzles). But despite these shortcomings, the food is outstanding and a welcome respite from the ordinary.





Kadai Chicken


















Problem is, I couldn't "announce" anything I wanted to eat. I had to point and hope my "Indian" waiter could read English translations of Indian food descriptions. I think I had "Kadai Chicken" and if that is correct, I can highly recommend you try it also. It came in a little copper pot. The chicken was hand cut (not those odd shaped bleached white chunks of whatever), and the curry, onions and peppers had just the right spice level. Served over fresh rice with a side order of "naan" and you are eating high on the Raji. And for a very reasonable price I might add ($13). On Sunday night when most places are closed, India Palace is open and serving very fresh: lamb, chicken or seafood vindaloo, palak, pasanda, josh, makani, bharta, and tikka.

If you trust Urban Spoon, you will see that India Palace consistently gets very high ratings for authentic "Indian" fare. So when you get tired of the usual and want to spice up your dining with a little adventuresome dining, the Carp highly recommends you consider India Palace for lunch or dinner. Don't worry about pronouncing what you want--just point and enjoy.

Carp Pleads Innocence--Legal Team Announced

(AP)--The "Blogging 11" were arraigned today at the Federal Courthouse. Each plead "not guilty" to the 65-count indictment charging they took favors from restaurants in exchange for glowing reviews. The defendants included bloggers from "Eat Gump," "Midtown Montgomery Living," "Lunch in the Gump," "Urban Spoon," "Lost in Montgomery," and "The Adventures of Pirate Bendy."

[Portions of article dealing with other blogs deleted]

Lunch in the Gump's Corn B. Carp refused to repeat his "I was baited!" quote made at his arrest last week. He deferred all questions to the head of his legal team Reginald T. McLucid who introduced the remainder of the team: David Copperfield and Chuckles the Clown. "This will be a dog and pony show to rival Barnum and Bailey," Mr. McLucid said as Copperfield made the 125-page indictment disappear in a puff of smoke.

"Poof!"

Also with "Team Carp" was a large oriental gentleman wearing a red silk robe and sandals presumed to be former wrestler Tojo Yamamoto and rumored to be Blogger # 2 referenced in the indictment.

Supporters of the indicted bloggers rallied outside the courthouse carrying signs. One woman, who would only say her name was "Tammy E", held a sign that read: "Cornbread, You Changed My Life!" When interviewed she said she was afraid to go out to many lunch spots in Montgomery until the "Lunch in the Gump" blog appeared. "I believe the Carp is innocent," she added, "I am here because I believe this is an injustice."

The crowd outside was not all pro-blogger. One man, who called himself "George" held a sign depicting a cloud of shoes circling Montgomery. "The other shoes are about the drop," he said with a mysterious grin.

U.S. Magistrate Judge Capell Howard set the trial for all eleven on April 4, 2011. At the present time, no motions for separate trials have been filed.

After the arraignment was over, the Blogging 11 enjoyed a fine lunch at Reggie's Place in the basement of the courthouse. Reggies was reviewed on Lunch in the Gump months ago.

Coach Saban Comments on Closing of Brew Pub

(Montgomery)--The Montgomery Brew Pub has "temporarily" closed, according to owner/manager/chef Chris Ellis. See article in The Montgomery Advertiser. We at Lunch in the Gump are extremely disappointed and hope he is not kidding about reopening soon with pool tables, dart boards and "Jenga." When Coach Saban was asked by some wag if he knew of the closing at his press conference following the unfortunate South Carolina Gamecock game, he said this:

What do I think about the Brewpub closed!?!? You've got to be %$*&#ing @#*!ing me!!!

We at LITG apologize for Coach Saban's potty mouth. We will probably get some e-mails and letters about this, and we should. But it was a dumb question.

Carp Indicted by FBI for Allegedly Demanding Improper Inducements for Favorable Post

(Association Press)-- A Montgomery blogger was arrested today at his trailer by agents of the Federal Blogging Institute (FBI) for allegedly demanding and accepting improper inducements from a restaurant owner to post a favorable review touting the owner's restaurant. Corn B. Carp, 33, was taken into custody at 4 a.m. this morning and charged with corrupt blogging, conspiracy to mislead the public and receiving improper inducements pertaining to a recent post on the "Lunch in the Gump" blog, which is purportedly the worlds most popular blog on eating lunch within the confines of the by-pass surrounding Montgomery, Alabama.

"This arrest reveals the dirty underbelly of the restaurant review blogging community," said chief investigator Prince Karming. "The Blog-Ola generated by organized and unlicensed restaurant review blogging corrupts many of those involved."
The 65-count indictment reveals that representatives of Green Papaya were wired by FBI agents when Mr. Carp, generally known by his nom de plume "Cornbread Carp," offered a favorable review in exchange for free egg rolls.

"I just want you to show me some love," the indictment quotes a tape of Mr. Carp during a phone call to the owner. "I really like egg rolls and a couple of egg rolls would help me understand the quality of the food and write a better review."

The indictment alleges that Mr .Carp received free egg rolls and, in exchange, wrote a glowing review of Green Papaya which appeared last week. In the review, still available at http://lunchinthegump.blogspot.com/2010/10/green-papaya-good-for-gump-and-you.html, "Cornbread Carp" made claims that the food would cause patrons to loose weight.

"Mr. Carp's mistake was asserting in the blog the egg rolls were 'complimentary' when we knew that they are always ala cart," said Karming who also noted that the post made several preposterous claims about the food.

When reached for comment Mr. Carp said only: "I was baited." He referred all questions to his attorney, Reginald McLucid. "This whole claim was politically motivated by Gov. Bob Riley because of a review of Eastbrook Cafe which revealed a raid on a local restaurant for serving pulley bones. We look forward to proving Mr. Carp's innocence at trial." McLucid noted that the Green Papaya had already been favorably reviewed on the Lunch in the Gump blog well before the alleged fraudulent transaction and that the egg rolls had no affect on Mr. Carp's review of the restaurant. "I mean, obviously, this guy really likes cornbread--not egg rolls," McLucid said.

Interestingly, the indictment listed several unnamed co-conspirators. For example, "Blogger No. 1" was described as suggesting the egg-rolls during a taped conversation at the restaurant. A "Blogger No. 2" was recorded speaking in a foreign accent--probably Asian--without articles in very short sentences like: "[Blogger No. 2] like." Further indictments are expected, said an unnamed source.

When contacted for comment, the Lunch in the Gump blog editors refused to take down the questioned post defiantly stating: "Except for all the obvious hyperbole concerning the benefits of Thai food, we stand by our post and behind the Carp!," the editor said. "Hell, we don't even allow advertising." The LITG web page does contain the following Advertising Disclaimer: "Although begged often to sell ads at ridiculously high rates, Lunch in the Gump has to date steadfastly refused to allow anyone to sway our opinions with the filthy lucre selling advertising space generates. The stupid "Adsense" stuff you see on the right-hand side is something Google adds but we (to date) have received none of the revenue from that nor do we control what the computer program selects for ads although the ads appear to be based upon what we post. Inquiries should be directed to bamabing@lunchinthegump.com."

Mr. Carp addresses the media with his counsel

Green Papaya Good for the Gump and You.

[Ed. Note: Despite the recent indictment of the "Cornbread Carp," except for the patent hyperbole concerning the benefits of Thai food, we stand behind this post and our friend.]

I know they do not serve cornbread, but GreenPapaya serves up the kind of food that makes a body feel good. Whomever at the Agonizer only voted the Green Papaya "three" forks has a lot of 'splainin to do. Why, that reviewer was dumber than Les Miles in the 4th quarter. Green Papaya is definitely "five" forks out of four by any unbiased observer.

Today the gang (Bama Bing, He Who Has no Nickname, The Younger, "Stormin Norman" and I) all decided to meet at the Forest Hills Shopping Center landmark where the prices are reasonable, service quick and food deliciously good for you. Boy were we not disappointed: Pud Thai, Mussman Curry Chicken, and some dish no one could pronounce. All served with a tasty soup, complimentary egg-rolls and a bottomless tea glass for under the Tojo Line. The chicken is hand raised, the curry home grown by Capuchin Monks, and the spices flown in daily from Laos. Some of the spices are known to lower cholesterol and increase the incidence of free radicals. They actually cause significant weight loss when ordered "Thai Hot." In other words, ordering food at Green Papaya causes you to leave healthier and thinner, if not slightly less wealthy.

Try as you might, I challenge you to find a better "Asian" food experience in the Gump. Voting on Urban Spoon has shown that a very high percentage of patrons of Green Papaya "like" it. In fact, Green Papaya is rated one of the top ten restaurants in the Gump and surrounding environs. So when voting time comes for the "Best of Montgomery" ratings in The Montgomery Advertiser, we at LITG expect you, our loyal readers, to vote early and often for Green Papaya. Together we can make it the number 1 "Chinese" restaurant in the Gump (as stupid as that sounds). It would be good for you and Montgomery.

Did I mention they serve beer?