The "Beast" at Sundown East

Not actual size

Once you get past being greeted by a hostess picking her teeth, the double-wide decor and the double-wides stuffed in the "Harley-Davidson" wife-beater t-shirt donned by your waitress, the LITG Gang consensus is that the Sundown East in the Forest Hills Shopping Center provides one of the best lunches for the money in the Gump especially if you order "The Beast".

The Tower of Terror

"The Beast" is the 1/2 pound hamburger steak smothered in gravy and onions that--with "The Works" (Swiss cheese and something else fattening)--can satisfy the most ravenous post-Aquapalooza hunger pangs. Substituting a salad (lettuce, onions and tomatoes only) for the fries you almost touch all the four food groups: (1) ground meat; (2) green stuff; (3) bread; and (4) gravy.

It should be noted that Henry Gates, Jr. (the Harvard Professor recently falsely accused of disorderly conduct because he yelled that he would "Do Yo Momma" to a Cambridge Cop) might not feel as welcome here as the Irish Catholic members of LITG, but if you like the infield at Talladega, you should fit right in.

I would rate the food at 3 toothpicks.

Value-wise, this is a real find: Only about 20 shares of GM (Motors Liquidation Company) (which is less than $10 bucks) will get you The Beast with The Works and a glass of tea.

Parking is easy and service is fast. Door to door from downtown in one hour or less.

Montgomery Brewing Company (ho-hum)

[Ed Note: In October 2010, the Montgomery Brewing Company announced they were closing for renovations.  Since then, no work has apparently been done.  It is now December 21, 2010 and it appears the MBC is finito.  Perhaps the following blog foretold the problem....]

I think the LITG crowd was underwhelmed by the Brew Pub. You folks better get off your butt.

I ordered a "Brew Pub Club," with a cup of gumbo, which, according to the menu, was supposed to be $8.50 http://www.montgomerybrewpub.com/Lunch.html . They got the gumbo out real quick (good), but I had to ask for tabasco & crackers (bad). The gumbo itself was flavorful, but the consistency of jello, so it came out of the cup in two bites. I didn't find a shrimp in there, but then again I didn't look real hard to begin with. Then my "Brew Pub Club" comes out. It was pretty much like anybody else's club: no better, no worse. Maybe a tad soggier. There were some non-extraordinary fries. All-in-all, about what you'd expect for $8.50, plus I'm thinking maybe $1.50 for the weak unsweet tea, tax & tip.

This ordinary lunch should've been about $13.00 bucks total, BUT NO! Apparently I wasn't specific enough that I wanted the club sandwich/cup of gumbo COMBO! Because of the aforesaid non-extraordinary fries, I got the Brew Pub Club ($7.50, but with fries!), plus a couple bites of tasty but pasty gumbo ($3.95), plus tea ($1.50... oops, sorry... not so fast! $2.25!!!) for a total of $15.07 pre-tip.

I'm no whiner, so I ponied up, left a $2.93 tip, or 21.4% of the pre-tax check (our service was real good, and LITG never stiffs hard-working waitpersons). So anyway, that was $18.00 for lunch... the WORST bang for the buck in LITG history (with the exception of that new hotel, maybe). The last time I spent so much for lunch in Montgomery was at Nancy Paterson's and I left there very satisfied.

$18.00 lunch = 30 shares of CNB common as of 7/20/09

Food = 2.5 biscuits
Service = 3 biscuits
Value = 1 biscuit

Derk's Filet & Vine

 We non-vegetarian "locals" who can decipher the "fillet" and "vine" codename all know that Derk's is a great place to buy fine wine and steaks in Old Cloverdale (just off Decatur Street). But Derk (who I believe tutored as a butcher under the owner of the old "Penny Profit") has for quite some time offered a buffet lunch counter that contains more entree (meat) selections than any other "meat and three" in the city with a touch more creativity than the usual fried or baked chicken and mystery meat. Yes, at Derk's they will usually have a stuffed pork loin or chicken Marsala or sauteed grouper in addition to the usual suspects. And the vegetable options usually include several casseroles. Only drawback is its popularity among the locals and the lines can be long. Generally speaking, if the line is past the produce section you might try Nancy Patterson's Bistro across the street for a true, sit down, experience. Also, if you become anxious when you cannot know for sure if you are going to be able to sit down when you get your food, Derk's is not the place for you. However, I must admit, when the food is served on the tray there seems to be a place to sit--if you do not mind sitting in the charcoal and lighter fluid section. Seriously, the food is way above average. I would rate it 4 chicken Marsala's. The place is a little pricey--i.e. over 15 shares of Colonial Bank Stock--but if you do not mind eating in the aisle of the grocery department it is worth every "Penny".

Dreamland Bar-B-Que

No formal Gump meeting today so took a break from my upcoming trial preparation to freelance a lunch at Dreamland in The Alley (101 Tallapoosa St). I have been there, oh maybe five times since it re-opened in The Alley two months ago. I know it may appear to be a chain, but I hear it has local ownership and involvement by the original family from Tuscaloosa. It sure does not feel like a chain. Chain or not, I am glad it is open on Mondays and is close to my work-release location.

You know about the Dreamland ribs with bibs--they are truly great--but when you go to a place for lunch often you tend to try new things you would not associate with a BBQ like salads and hamburgers and Quesadillas! The "Dream Cheeseburger" ($7.95) is a close second behind Hamburger King in tasty burgerness. The chopped chicken salad ($8.95) is also surprisingly hearty with just enough romaine lettuce to provide plausible dietary deniability.

But today I ventured "South of the border" for a Chicken Quesadilla ($6.95) off the appetizer menu. I call it Mex-i-Que with sour cream and sauce on the side. Plenty to eat. In an out in 30 minutes with friendly service: "How you doin' baby?"

Ambiance is cool. If eating alone, sit at bar and face the three HDTVs with ESPN channels while catching up on the weekend sports. Today it was Federer's 15 slams, the sad McNair situation and "Tiger Wins Again" at Congressional.

Without my "peeps" I was able to remain low profile and was not noticed by management as a member of the "Lunch in the Gump" Gang. So I believe my experience was typical of what you could expect on any given day for lunch in the land of dreams.

On the Gump Scale, Dreamland is 4 of 5 biscuits.